Your old printer is completely worthless; why not do what these guys did and entertain yourself by attacking it? Just think of all of those times that it drove you to the brink of insanity with paper jams, low ink jet cartridges and slow printing. Do you really want to show it the mercy of a recycling center? Of course not. You want to kick it, torch it, shoot it or find some other creative way to destroy the bane of your life!
You’ll have a difficult time being original though; the people who have come before you have set the bar high as they raged against their machines. Here are 25 ways to make that printer pay for what it put you through. Bookmark it should you ever need to vent your frustration!
The Basic Printer Attack
This comedic video sums up the frustration of the broken printer and the act of destroying it. Yell at it, punch it, take it to the parking lot to run over it with your Jeep and drive away.
Let’s See That One More Time
At first glance this seems like a straightforward video showing the simple fall of a printer to its untimely death several staircases below. But watch closely; it gets magically put together and dropped again … and again. It’s like instant gratification on replay.
Down the Stairs
Now here’s a straightforward video of the printer being thrown down a set of outside stairs. Just remember that someone’s going to have to clean that up.
Exploding Powder
This video will let you watch a printer blow up. Even better, it’s going to give you a how-to guide to doing it yourself.
Old School Beat Down
There’s really no need to get fancy when beating up your printer. A bat and a good old-fashioned beat down can do wonders for the soul.
Sledgehammer
There’s really no way to destroy a printer that is more gratifying than smashing it to bits with a sledgehammer. It even feels good to watch someone else do it.
Karate Kick
This guy might want to take some kickboxing classes because it doesn’t look like he did that much damage to his printer. Still, he gets an E for Effort.
Torch It!
In the hands of a professional, an oxy-acetylene welding torch can cause a printer to nearly disintegrate. Don’t get too mesmerised by the fire; you need to be ready to extinguish it.
For all the Pyros in the Audience
You don’t need a welding torch to light your printer on fire. Just contain the action and let it burn!
Crushed!
Crush the printer by toppling a huge machine over on top of it. Kills two birds with one stone.
Drive Over It
Big off-road truck tires + little printer = sad story. Actually, it’s quite impressive that it takes more than one back-and-forth of this truck to cause the printer to collapse.
Watch out below!
These guys seem unclear as to whether they’re fifteen or sixteen stories up when they drop their printer down a laundry chute but the end result is a printer in pieces. Hang in there ‘til the end; the last thirty seconds of the video are the best.
Firecrackers!
Step one, get your hands on big firecrackers. Step two, set them inside the printer. Step three, light and run! The language of printer destruction is universal.
Bigger is Better
If firecrackers seem too weak for you, maybe you should upgrade to a bomb. Simple, yet satisfying.
In the Dorm Room
Even when you don’t have a lot of space to work with, there’s room to throw your printer against the ground.
Double Trouble
Another video that shows you can do some serious printer damage in a small room. This one challenges you to not just throw the printer against the floor but to follow up by kicking it.
Military Attack
Fed up with equipment that isn’t working, these soldiers decide to take military weapons to their printer and show it who’s boss.
All You Really Need is an AK-47
That’s why this video only takes seven seconds to watch.
Shoot ‘Em Up
Seven seconds might not satisfy you if you’re really looking to salivate over someone else’s printer destruction. This video draws out the shooting death of the printer to satisfy your needs.
Trash Compactor
If you don’t want to destroy your printer yourself, you can let the garbage man do the dirty work for you.
Find an Alternative
It’s man vs. machine in this short office scene. Man gives it his best shot but machine wins this round.
From the Movies
Office Space did it best. Gather some friends, beat that printer with a bat and then dance about it.
Take Down the Whole Building
Why destroy just one printer when you can implode a whole building of them? That’s essentially what Kodak did here.
DIY Approach
Ready to go destroy a printer but don’t want to have to buy yourself a new one just yet? There’s a game online where you can take a bat and a variety of other weapons to a virtual printer.
Foot Fetish
Pretty pink sneakers can do a number on that printer. Efficient and sexy at the same time. You’d let her walk all over you.
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